Mathew’s bedroom is reconfigured to hold both his queen sized bed and the hospital bed. So far he just looks at the electric bed balefully and won’t try it. Eventually I know he will. The big bed is pushed against the wall with the window and the hospital bed sits beside it (think of how twin beds get set up with a drawer between them; same idea). We moved his tv stand out and put it in the garbage. It disappeared long before the garbage truck came by so someone got themselves a good deal!

The double dresser was moved back into Mathew’s room. It was in our room for months, to make room for the mattress/cot we put into the bedroom to watch over Mathew. John took our Living Room tv and moved it into the bedroom and hooked everything up on the opposite wall. The bigger tv is in there so Mathew can see it without sitting close in his chair. Remember he is supposed to wear glasses although, aside from Disney World, he hasn’t for years.

Mathew was quite uptight by all the hustle and bustle in preparing for the hospital bed and then setting everything up. We already had single bed sheets because Kristen had her single bed until a few months ago.

The recliner fits in the corner of the room between the hospital bed and the closet. It faces the tv so whoever sits there can watch it too.

Dr. Wildish dropped in for a visit again because Mathew’s leg pain is still not well controlled. Mathew fell asleep last night, exhausted, and did manage to sleep until 7 am. He is feeling better and much more chatty but refused to leave his bed because of his legs. Dr. Wildish was loathe to increase the morphine again after yesterday’s significant hike. She came by to see how alert Mathew was and to talk to him about his pain. Afterwards she decided to increase his morphine by a little bit more. We are waiting for the nurse to come with her magical key that opens the machine to increase the dose.

If that doesn’t work then she is considering switching to Dilaudid. Dr. Wildish is also going to talk to the Radiation Oncologist again, to see if Mathew can receive radiation in one “big” dose and what the chances of success are.

Prior to moving the dresser-drawers back to Mathew’s room they were cleaned and sorted. I set items into one of three bags; 1 for garbage, 1 for storage/give away and 1 for keeping. I had to hold each item and decide if it fits Mathew or if it is something he wants to keep. In essence it was housecleaning his effects before he dies. It was horrible. It was a sudden whammy of grief knowing he will never see these things again and won’t be well enough to care about them.

Today was a hard day.